Lock Down - Reflections
In my work and in my personal life, I see 3 groups of people right now:
People for whom life hasn’t changed that much. They are working from home and perhaps they are enjoying this freedom. Perhaps they are furloughed and earn enough that this is not a worry for them. I spoke to several of these people just last week, how I envy them!
People who are bored. They are at home, perhaps alone, perhaps with others and nothing to do, no purpose to fill their time beyond tiding cupboard and reading, exercising or whatever activities they cherish. I like the sound of this too.
The people whose lives are full and busy. People whose job has changed considerably due to the pandemic, people who are striving to work, to home school, to care for elderly relatives, sick family members. That’s where many of us will sit. If you don’t have caring responsibilities you are perhaps feeling resentful that other colleagues aren’t working as hard as you. If you have kids and others to care for, perhaps you feel guilt that you aren’t able to contribute as much as you would like. People in this category seem to be feeling a sense of dissatisfaction with their lot.
One things is for sure. Most people will look at someone else’s situation and want some of that.
The situation at the moment is something none of us would have chosen and we are all adjusting to the new normal in our own ways. I have spoken in recent weeks to many people who are feeling guilty, resentful, lonely, stuck, frustrated, scared or all of these things.
We are living a significant part of the worlds history. In the future, people might ask what you remember about what you did in the Covid Crisis of 2020. How do you want to respond?
You might say that you were juggling too much, you tried to spend time with your children who seem unsettled, or needed schooling, were missing their friends. In most cases we don’t know what children think and how they are dealing with this, we want to protect and reassure them it’s all ok. But while we do that, there are calls, messages from colleagues and work to do be done.
You might be on the other side of this equation. You might be in a position where you are working and it feels unfair that others aren’t. I get that. I’d probably feel the same in all honesty. But for everyone, there will be times in our lives where we need to rely on others. Perhaps you will get ill, perhaps you will have a bereavement, perhaps you will have family members who need you to care for them. There will undoubtedly be times where you need support and understanding of those around you. That could be in 20 years time, or in the next 20 minutes. We don’t know when that will happen. What help and support would you appreciate in the future? Perhaps you can be the person to offer that to others now.
So in 60 years time, perhaps a cohort of kids will be doing project work at school, interviewing you about your experience of Covid 19 in 2020. You might tell them how everyone pulled together and helped each other out. You might tell them how you resented your colleagues for not working hard enough, or resented your kids because they prevented you from doing your job to the best of your ability.
How we respond to this situation is something that we all get to decide for ourselves. What could you do today that your future self will be proud of?
How do you replace your negative emotions with acts of kindness and compassion to yourself and others?
Last year a client of mine said something that I have thought about most weeks since. I’ll leave you with that. ‘If you can accept that everyone around you is doing their best right now, you will feel so much better about just about everything’.
